Bad Dream

This is the story of how I found out about Eric, Kim, and Brian. I wrote it only about an hour after I heard the news. I was writing to distract myself from concentrating on the reality of it, but I couldn't get my mind off it and before I knew it I was writing about it.



My mom was talking on the phone with my eldest brother. I can't remember where I was going, just that I became interested in the conversation with her words, "Yeah, we're still going. Why?"
She was talking about the trip her and my dad were planning on for their anniversary.
"Ok. I'll call Catherine," she said after a pause, looking slightly confused.
I stood in the hallway watching my mom pace the kitchen floor as she dialed Catherine's work number.
"So what's going on?" my mother asked when Catherine answered. She stopped dead in her tracks as her hand flew up to her mouth. She bent over slightly. "Eric?" she whispered, pure horror on her face. Curiosity flooded through me as I watched my mother. This was bad, I could tell.
When my mom finally hung up she turned to me and called my father.
"There's something I need to tell you," her voice was serious, but pained, "Sit down." She gestured to the chairs in the kitchen.
Sit down? Was it really that bad? I usually stayed well enough in control that I had never needed to sit down.
"Sit down," she repeated, looking at my confused expression.
I obediently sat and rested my chin on my thumbs while I covered my mouth with my fingers. This was bad. How bad, though?
"There was a plane crash this morning," my mother sat down herself, "It took three lives."
Oh, no. I felt my throat tighten a little.
".....Eric Johnson...." What?! My piano teacher's husband? I knew him well, they were in my ward.
".....Kim Acton....." No! We were good friends. He was always teasing me at church.
".....and Brian Bayles....." At this point I felt a numbness wash over me. Brian, too? Good ole Brian who was like an older brother to me? All three of them? All who I knew so well and was so close to? It wasn't true.....
Shock, horror, and the reality of it all washed over me in an instant. It was true. I held completely still, looking across the table into my mother's eyes as tears raced down my own. No. NO!!! My insides were screaming and twisting in agony.
I stood up from the table, quickly losing control, and steadily walked to my bedroom, closing the door behind me. Then I snapped. I dropped to the floor, hitting my knees hard, but didn't feel the pain of it. My hands raised up to my head, clutched into fists. My tears were now flooding down my cheeks and neck, dampening the front of my shirt. I rocked back and forth, taking in quick gasps of air as my insides continued to wail.
They were gone. Never to joke with me again. Eric and Brian never to hold their young children in their arms again. Never watch them grow up. Kim never to see his youngest son return home off his mission. They were no longer a part of this life.
My heart suddenly jumped out to their wives. Eric and Brians' so young. Kim's now home alone.
My tears came faster and hotter. It's not fair!! I wanted to scream. My mom came in and put her hands on my shoulders.
"Do we need to get someone to work for you today?"
"I'll do it," I replied weakly, slowly standing up. I went and made the phone calls and returned to my room. My dad stepped in with a look of concern on his face. "Do you need us to stay here?" he asked, looking at my tear-streaked face.
"No. You can go." They hadn't done anything for their anniversary in a long time.
"That wouldn't be very good," he replied, "Leaving you home alone... now.... like this...."
"I'll be fine," I tried to smile as proof, "I'll just keep myself busy."
He pursed his lips and left my room. I was more in control of myself, though my tears still endlessly streamed from my eyes. I stared blankly into nothingness. It couldn't be. Three incredible men. Why? It's just a bad dream..... But it wasn't. I knew that. They were gone. Leaving so many lives altered forever.....